Dreams .....Is been long time since i have a dream ..People said that dream is a relfection of what our hopes and whats we thinks in real life and i agreed with it But I have this dream since form 4 and I dont know why its always keep on my dream land but sure its tell some story
When i enter remove ,i can said that it probably one of the hardest year in my life ,I am soo geeky in first year of high school ,i barely have a friend to talk because of my geeky personalities ,all of old school friends starts to disconnect with me because they go to different school with me ,some night i even cry because i am really lonely ,For my memory I still remember i have a best friend travis .he is my first best friend in high school .he is really nice and help my out ,part of my english is what he help me ,you have no idea i couldt even speak during first year of high school .
We been in same class in remove & form 1 ,starts from form 2 ,my personalities starts to change ,for the bad side ,i still remember we still talk while meet in school ,during early of form 3 ,he telling me something ,he said that he will move to canada with his family ,i though he is kidding since he used to tell me about this in remove ,i didt took it serious but still congratulated to him but later is real ! when i find out this ,i am too late .
What i feels regret is how come i been making this mistakes ,i even lost his e-mail address and now we dont have the chances to chat again !! I guess this is what dreams are telling ......
Monday, June 29, 2009
Thursday, June 25, 2009
What Happen In Today .....
I reliaze that I rarely to blog about what happen in that day or what did i do in certain today ,check out others friends blogs ,most of them basiclly share about their life and fun stuff but I only wrote about the feelings and deeps things ...So I decided to blog about what happen in today ..
Today is my off fay which I'm very happy about it since i got time to really relax,hang out with family ,doing my own things and just being myself ...To starts off this morning ,after fetch clement to school ,me and mother are going to pasar and we eat some nice food ,around 10.30 .dad come and bring us to the very nice vintage old style-ish dim sum place and i gotta tell you that those dim sum are stunning !! if you come to penang you Must tried it and some penang people never even know this place but once you eat them ,you can taste about the amazing taste and will be remeber about it .
I Promise myself today gonna get a haircut ,i know i just got a haircut a month ago but the sides of my hair is getting longer and i have no freaking idea how to take care them ,and i basiclly look like crap coz i didt style it ,thats why i need a haircut .so dad fetch me all the day to air itam to get my hair done... At first the hairstyling is encourage me to wait for my hair to grow longer but i couldt because i just feels sucky ,then i told him to cut my hair and make it look good ,i also ask him about tips to take care the hair and how to style it since i'm not really good at it .
I am pretty happy with the results ...then ,dad have to go queensbay mall to take care something ,so me and mom going to shopping ,mom looking for some nice pants ,we go to gap.forever21.guess.padini but couldt find what we want ,then dad buy us some mcdonald ....
on the way back home ,parents stop by and buy some fresh fish ,vegetables & big prawns and gonna cook it tonight .....awwww ....i love my family soo much
Today is my off fay which I'm very happy about it since i got time to really relax,hang out with family ,doing my own things and just being myself ...To starts off this morning ,after fetch clement to school ,me and mother are going to pasar and we eat some nice food ,around 10.30 .dad come and bring us to the very nice vintage old style-ish dim sum place and i gotta tell you that those dim sum are stunning !! if you come to penang you Must tried it and some penang people never even know this place but once you eat them ,you can taste about the amazing taste and will be remeber about it .
I Promise myself today gonna get a haircut ,i know i just got a haircut a month ago but the sides of my hair is getting longer and i have no freaking idea how to take care them ,and i basiclly look like crap coz i didt style it ,thats why i need a haircut .so dad fetch me all the day to air itam to get my hair done... At first the hairstyling is encourage me to wait for my hair to grow longer but i couldt because i just feels sucky ,then i told him to cut my hair and make it look good ,i also ask him about tips to take care the hair and how to style it since i'm not really good at it .
I am pretty happy with the results ...then ,dad have to go queensbay mall to take care something ,so me and mom going to shopping ,mom looking for some nice pants ,we go to gap.forever21.guess.padini but couldt find what we want ,then dad buy us some mcdonald ....
on the way back home ,parents stop by and buy some fresh fish ,vegetables & big prawns and gonna cook it tonight .....awwww ....i love my family soo much
My Plan
I tell you what my plan is....
My Plan for myself is to taking care the best of myself and my family and i velieve that i could really do it well ,I starts to save money because i will go to france in 2010 which is what i want to succeed my dream or some people call my desire .
Lately i am not really happy with the workplace but the truth is i really dont care about it anymore because i feels like i dont care whether what they want to do ,if someone wants to put you in a bad position and always bad mouth behind your back or someone always misunderstood your point and couldt see how hard you tried to work then you feels like losing ''it'' ,it feels like dont give a damn anymore ,seriously ! i feels that sometimes people think they know me and my personalities and Easily to catch my weakness ,i hate to tell you but i am not really who you think because the game just begin if you really do wants to pick up a starts .
I really dont care about it .you can win everything if you want and if you think you can but as long i am the last man standing and last one wins then i will takes my times to see how you failed
My Plan for myself is to taking care the best of myself and my family and i velieve that i could really do it well ,I starts to save money because i will go to france in 2010 which is what i want to succeed my dream or some people call my desire .
Lately i am not really happy with the workplace but the truth is i really dont care about it anymore because i feels like i dont care whether what they want to do ,if someone wants to put you in a bad position and always bad mouth behind your back or someone always misunderstood your point and couldt see how hard you tried to work then you feels like losing ''it'' ,it feels like dont give a damn anymore ,seriously ! i feels that sometimes people think they know me and my personalities and Easily to catch my weakness ,i hate to tell you but i am not really who you think because the game just begin if you really do wants to pick up a starts .
I really dont care about it .you can win everything if you want and if you think you can but as long i am the last man standing and last one wins then i will takes my times to see how you failed
Monday, June 22, 2009
Photo POST
Just Post a photo of myself to let y'll see ;)
This is the new me ,new personalities ,new package and starts all over
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Learning Culture
One of the Padini 7 Culture is Learning Culture .
And Its actually a great value because its states that we need to learn in every single minute of our life because no matter how experience we are ,we still need to accept and learn new things ,accept the mistakes that you make and make sure learn your lesson from it .Thats the real value about it .
Learning Culture ! Do you know that what the hell did I learn in these 2 days ,Argh ?!/Not sometimes that i can proud of .....Actually its not even a peny worthy to blog about it but i'd love to write it out and express about these shit ....
What I learn is BITCHES Never Die ,its like james bond movie ,you know ? those villans who non-stop to attack you ,I have no idea why they always like to do that ,sometimes you just wish to slap in their face but one thing I'd always remind myself is if i pissed with them which equal and its makes me a idiot because these bitches not worth to make yourself angry because of them ,because it is what they born to make ,I learn to suck it up and facing them and become a better person ...
What i also learn is sometimes you know but you cant speak ,Sorry that me for being a stupid idiot because sometimes i just dont know how to shut my damn mouth and for being too expressive and let people know how i feels ,at first i though this is part of my personalities but then it was a mistake that i really need to behave ,people dont apperciate you for being real but people will dislike you for being too honest ,funny isnt it !!!!!!!! Now I learn ,do you know that i perfer to be dumb ,You know what ? I Dont care what the shit that you put me on but If you want to win all way long then I'll let you to but As matter of fact as long I am the last man who stand then i dont give a shit about you .
What hurt the most is when sometimes you'd put your heart and soul into something but people still think that you are not good enough and always get pick because they thinks that you are not serious about ,damn ! I need something that can speak out loudly to them that I do listen and try my best ...
WHATEVER !!!!!!!!! LIFE IS SHORT AND BITCHES ARE EVERYWHERE ,I SHALL NOT WASTE MY SHIT TO SHITTING ABOUT THOSE BITCHES .FUCK THEM OFF ,THEY'RE FUCKING LOSER ANYWAY.
I Have a great future and you dont ,sorry but thats the facts not my opinion
ETA : Sorry for cursing
And Its actually a great value because its states that we need to learn in every single minute of our life because no matter how experience we are ,we still need to accept and learn new things ,accept the mistakes that you make and make sure learn your lesson from it .Thats the real value about it .
Learning Culture ! Do you know that what the hell did I learn in these 2 days ,Argh ?!/Not sometimes that i can proud of .....Actually its not even a peny worthy to blog about it but i'd love to write it out and express about these shit ....
What I learn is BITCHES Never Die ,its like james bond movie ,you know ? those villans who non-stop to attack you ,I have no idea why they always like to do that ,sometimes you just wish to slap in their face but one thing I'd always remind myself is if i pissed with them which equal and its makes me a idiot because these bitches not worth to make yourself angry because of them ,because it is what they born to make ,I learn to suck it up and facing them and become a better person ...
What i also learn is sometimes you know but you cant speak ,Sorry that me for being a stupid idiot because sometimes i just dont know how to shut my damn mouth and for being too expressive and let people know how i feels ,at first i though this is part of my personalities but then it was a mistake that i really need to behave ,people dont apperciate you for being real but people will dislike you for being too honest ,funny isnt it !!!!!!!! Now I learn ,do you know that i perfer to be dumb ,You know what ? I Dont care what the shit that you put me on but If you want to win all way long then I'll let you to but As matter of fact as long I am the last man who stand then i dont give a shit about you .
What hurt the most is when sometimes you'd put your heart and soul into something but people still think that you are not good enough and always get pick because they thinks that you are not serious about ,damn ! I need something that can speak out loudly to them that I do listen and try my best ...
WHATEVER !!!!!!!!! LIFE IS SHORT AND BITCHES ARE EVERYWHERE ,I SHALL NOT WASTE MY SHIT TO SHITTING ABOUT THOSE BITCHES .FUCK THEM OFF ,THEY'RE FUCKING LOSER ANYWAY.
I Have a great future and you dont ,sorry but thats the facts not my opinion
ETA : Sorry for cursing
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Dream Or Desire
Its Dream or Desire ,Both Defination is differents am I trutly Understand the meaning behind those words or I am just using them to cover up something about my new truthself Personalities
Today I online to Msn Chatting Room ,I never expect to chat with someone since I am not really a junkie of Msn or sort of online chatting room stuff ,plus its been long time since i online ,Then suddenly someone pop out and its a close friend of mine who's from high school ,you know what ? I dont know how to label her because the friendship is very blur very blur ,we used to be so close but used to thinks that everything isnt real but is it our relationship excist ? Maybe I was thinking too much but whatever .
I never expect it would be her because she probably the least person I ever expect specially its been long time ,She told me some good news of a friend who I know in high school getting marriage ,my first reaction is 'someone must forgot their condom' turns out I am wrong about it ,they getting marriage because they love each others .which is weird to me because not to be critic them but I truly never see this personalities of this girl during high school ,but i might be wrong since high school is over ,everthing is about reborn so as myself .After that we starts talks about what happen in our now .I told her that my dream list is :
- Buy a Gucci in next year for myself
- Buy a New PC for myself
- Buy a handphone for my father as his birthday present
- Travel to Euro in 2011/2012
At first her reaction is good then she thinks that it just dream or it is my huge desire ,I never truly see both differents and I actually dont care about it as long I can reach for something I want ,I would consider these are the things to do before you get marriage because time is pass soo fast and I dont want to do something that is makes me regret about in my life since i been wasting too much time in the past .I told her that I has changes a lots ,also not that person who she see in earlier of this year [thats probably the last time we see each other]
She thinks that i put a lots of pressure and stress ,thinks too much in my sholder and ask me whether i am really happy with who i am now ,my intial reaction is i think i know what is she talking about but i can said that sometimes you thinks you knew but actually you not even near know .because the past doesnt represent the now ,everyone looking forward to their own future and do what they can do for the best .My answer for her is I AM happy with who i am and what i am right now .When i typing these sentences I just reliaze that how much i has change ,I know this sounds crazy but its truth .
I dont want to label or the definations of differents between the words dream & desire ,to me both of the same just the matter of the way you treat ,I do agreed that my personalities has changes ,both for good and bad sides ,I know whats the goods and bads is but I wont gonna change it .I guess my desire is too much then .....
Funny fact is I write pretty long post this time ,maybe finally I know what to write consider i struggle to write blog lately
Today I online to Msn Chatting Room ,I never expect to chat with someone since I am not really a junkie of Msn or sort of online chatting room stuff ,plus its been long time since i online ,Then suddenly someone pop out and its a close friend of mine who's from high school ,you know what ? I dont know how to label her because the friendship is very blur very blur ,we used to be so close but used to thinks that everything isnt real but is it our relationship excist ? Maybe I was thinking too much but whatever .
I never expect it would be her because she probably the least person I ever expect specially its been long time ,She told me some good news of a friend who I know in high school getting marriage ,my first reaction is 'someone must forgot their condom' turns out I am wrong about it ,they getting marriage because they love each others .which is weird to me because not to be critic them but I truly never see this personalities of this girl during high school ,but i might be wrong since high school is over ,everthing is about reborn so as myself .After that we starts talks about what happen in our now .I told her that my dream list is :
- Buy a Gucci in next year for myself
- Buy a New PC for myself
- Buy a handphone for my father as his birthday present
- Travel to Euro in 2011/2012
At first her reaction is good then she thinks that it just dream or it is my huge desire ,I never truly see both differents and I actually dont care about it as long I can reach for something I want ,I would consider these are the things to do before you get marriage because time is pass soo fast and I dont want to do something that is makes me regret about in my life since i been wasting too much time in the past .I told her that I has changes a lots ,also not that person who she see in earlier of this year [thats probably the last time we see each other]
She thinks that i put a lots of pressure and stress ,thinks too much in my sholder and ask me whether i am really happy with who i am now ,my intial reaction is i think i know what is she talking about but i can said that sometimes you thinks you knew but actually you not even near know .because the past doesnt represent the now ,everyone looking forward to their own future and do what they can do for the best .My answer for her is I AM happy with who i am and what i am right now .When i typing these sentences I just reliaze that how much i has change ,I know this sounds crazy but its truth .
I dont want to label or the definations of differents between the words dream & desire ,to me both of the same just the matter of the way you treat ,I do agreed that my personalities has changes ,both for good and bad sides ,I know whats the goods and bads is but I wont gonna change it .I guess my desire is too much then .....
Funny fact is I write pretty long post this time ,maybe finally I know what to write consider i struggle to write blog lately
Monday, June 15, 2009
Changes ....
Changes ,I feels like .the changes tissue starts growing inside my body ,as many of my previous posts compared the last year and this year of me ,many people included myself also states that nor as in my physical or personalities got many changes ......
Changes ..... I actually though thats a great things ,consider look back to the past ,i dont regonize that person from that snapshot .Its actually me but for certain reason it feels like a clone with personalities of me or a less version of this is my now .is funny that 2 days ago re-watched carrie underwood golden moment during her idol [2004] ,I just figure out that its been so fast that i watching that TV show for many years .I look at other TV I also didt notice that Jordin sparks idol winning song is actually the same as my blog title .Funny isnt it .Watching Carrie underwood from Country all american farm girl turn into one of the best country singer in america nowdays .This isnt a realitytv or a soap opera with script or a teen stupid drama but its real life ,reflex back to myself ,is funny to remind me of the things that bothers me during my high school year .I have waste too much time of the stupid things .am i ?
This month I had meet many people that i didt meet in about half year of many year ,Still in their vision I still that chubby fat guy with over-hyper personalities or weirdo .the reactions that they seen the new me is good ,many people ask that what did i do to make myself lose weight ,funny facts is the ''new'' which i label the people that i meet at works ,some thinks that i put on some weight last month .Funny isnt it .Today I meet someone from High school ,is funny that she forgot my name and who I am but she still remember my face .the funniest things is I am 180 from the vision during high school but Maybe my face is different and easy to remember ? I dont know ,in my workplace I has been ask that whether i had a brother because someone said that previous worker look kind of like me ? erm ...i consider thats a good thing !
Changes ...I feels much confidents now compare than before but the bad things is the cockyness starts to grow even more than ever ,I used to though that i been create a better humble personalities for myself but recap myself again like a episode ,I feels like its actually a fake-ness ....I dont know how to explain and I dont know why ..I think that probably I starts wants to renew everythings ....
Changes .....
Changes ..... I actually though thats a great things ,consider look back to the past ,i dont regonize that person from that snapshot .Its actually me but for certain reason it feels like a clone with personalities of me or a less version of this is my now .is funny that 2 days ago re-watched carrie underwood golden moment during her idol [2004] ,I just figure out that its been so fast that i watching that TV show for many years .I look at other TV I also didt notice that Jordin sparks idol winning song is actually the same as my blog title .Funny isnt it .Watching Carrie underwood from Country all american farm girl turn into one of the best country singer in america nowdays .This isnt a realitytv or a soap opera with script or a teen stupid drama but its real life ,reflex back to myself ,is funny to remind me of the things that bothers me during my high school year .I have waste too much time of the stupid things .am i ?
This month I had meet many people that i didt meet in about half year of many year ,Still in their vision I still that chubby fat guy with over-hyper personalities or weirdo .the reactions that they seen the new me is good ,many people ask that what did i do to make myself lose weight ,funny facts is the ''new'' which i label the people that i meet at works ,some thinks that i put on some weight last month .Funny isnt it .Today I meet someone from High school ,is funny that she forgot my name and who I am but she still remember my face .the funniest things is I am 180 from the vision during high school but Maybe my face is different and easy to remember ? I dont know ,in my workplace I has been ask that whether i had a brother because someone said that previous worker look kind of like me ? erm ...i consider thats a good thing !
Changes ...I feels much confidents now compare than before but the bad things is the cockyness starts to grow even more than ever ,I used to though that i been create a better humble personalities for myself but recap myself again like a episode ,I feels like its actually a fake-ness ....I dont know how to explain and I dont know why ..I think that probably I starts wants to renew everythings ....
Changes .....
Sunday, June 14, 2009
P.O.V
About couple weeks ago I watch TYRA Show on youtube and that episode is talking about the racial problem and the way people handle and treat in such environment ,it does depends because even though its the same story but if the races is differents then it become another whole new story !
P.O.V = Point of view ,Watching that episode really inpirsed me of how people reacted on different cases because in that episode ,they show differents clips ,funny facts is the way people reacted is totally differents ,If a white woman carried 3 children vs a black woman carried 3 children then people would think different way ,same things happen with when a black guy got chase by a white guy than a black guy chase a white guy .
Lets talks about our POV in our life ,we treat things differently isnt it ,put away the racist things if things happen .in the end we still stick to what we believe it .sometimes people disagreed with us or did such things that makes us disagreed ,actually there' s no evil in this world because if we stand on that side then we would thinks differents because there's a point of view .
but i choose to stick to what i believe ,because its my P.O.V
P.O.V = Point of view ,Watching that episode really inpirsed me of how people reacted on different cases because in that episode ,they show differents clips ,funny facts is the way people reacted is totally differents ,If a white woman carried 3 children vs a black woman carried 3 children then people would think different way ,same things happen with when a black guy got chase by a white guy than a black guy chase a white guy .
Lets talks about our POV in our life ,we treat things differently isnt it ,put away the racist things if things happen .in the end we still stick to what we believe it .sometimes people disagreed with us or did such things that makes us disagreed ,actually there' s no evil in this world because if we stand on that side then we would thinks differents because there's a point of view .
but i choose to stick to what i believe ,because its my P.O.V
Thursday, June 11, 2009
I have soo many things to blog about ....
I Have soo many things to blog about ....
I Really have ,sometimes during workplace my minds told me a lots of story in my head and i wants to share with you guys .Some times i saw something and it remind me of what happen in the past and what happen now .so many topics that i could blog about pops in my head that i could share with you people .but it all just slash in the short moment .When i go onto the blog i tried to remember the things that i wants to blog about ,my minds goes blank for certain reason .I just couldt explain how and why it is that way ,I still think that maybe i wants to write about it but words ! no matter how many grammar i use but i just couldt explain that feelings in that moment .
I have so many things to blog about ,I wants to blogs about myself ,I really wants .I wants to let some old friends to know how am I doing lately .Am I still the person that you think you know ? At least i could let the people and friend who care about me know what's up with me lately and my plan .Sudden I felt like turn into another myself because i thinks that I am no longer the Me that they used to know .
Yesterday I also reliaze something about myself ,No just i grown but I know that i cry much compared to previous 5 years i think ,Those tears no matter how hard I tried to hold but my eyes holder but I always failed !? I wont blame myself for tearing up But I would blame myself when I did not learn from the mistaeks ,Tearing up doesnt make up weaker like in the past but from what I learn ,tearing up makes me a stronger person for now .
I have so many things to blog about but I reliaze that is it worth to blog about ?
I Really have ,sometimes during workplace my minds told me a lots of story in my head and i wants to share with you guys .Some times i saw something and it remind me of what happen in the past and what happen now .so many topics that i could blog about pops in my head that i could share with you people .but it all just slash in the short moment .When i go onto the blog i tried to remember the things that i wants to blog about ,my minds goes blank for certain reason .I just couldt explain how and why it is that way ,I still think that maybe i wants to write about it but words ! no matter how many grammar i use but i just couldt explain that feelings in that moment .
I have so many things to blog about ,I wants to blogs about myself ,I really wants .I wants to let some old friends to know how am I doing lately .Am I still the person that you think you know ? At least i could let the people and friend who care about me know what's up with me lately and my plan .Sudden I felt like turn into another myself because i thinks that I am no longer the Me that they used to know .
Yesterday I also reliaze something about myself ,No just i grown but I know that i cry much compared to previous 5 years i think ,Those tears no matter how hard I tried to hold but my eyes holder but I always failed !? I wont blame myself for tearing up But I would blame myself when I did not learn from the mistaeks ,Tearing up doesnt make up weaker like in the past but from what I learn ,tearing up makes me a stronger person for now .
I have so many things to blog about but I reliaze that is it worth to blog about ?
Sunday, June 7, 2009
~GOLD~
Recently I like to said some words or lines that i think is quit useful and pretty 'classic' and those you probably heard people said in movie or novel .such as 'you want that person to be smart but not too smart but you also dont want that person to be dumb'
Thursday, June 4, 2009
A Day for Myself .
Today its my off day and i will apperciate this amazing day because ever since working in padini ,i learn a lots & other .same time it is really tired because it requires a lots of enegry during worktime and others aspects as well that requires .
Many many Full days in my working hours ,i'd happy to have it because i can earn extra moneys for my income but it is very tired ,i wont gonna lie that sometimes i feels tired but when you think about the money that you learn then you totally forgot about all of that .
people said that take a rest would help you go further in the future ,thats totally right and now i understand what it means .Today I consider myself as a day for my own redeemtion ,which makes my spirit.emotion & body feels much better etc ...Hang out with parents is one of the best i ever have because you only have one parents in your entire life ,they are the people who born you .help you and always next to you in your life from the day you grow till the day the leave you .every single moment is something money cant buy .thats why i am very apperciate with the time with them ,sometimes when i back time ,seeing my parents is one of the best reason to go home because thats my home .
Today my plan is to take good care for myself ,bring some goodies ,get a excercize because i gain weight lately and many people comment about it and get a great facial massage .
Today is a good day
Many many Full days in my working hours ,i'd happy to have it because i can earn extra moneys for my income but it is very tired ,i wont gonna lie that sometimes i feels tired but when you think about the money that you learn then you totally forgot about all of that .
people said that take a rest would help you go further in the future ,thats totally right and now i understand what it means .Today I consider myself as a day for my own redeemtion ,which makes my spirit.emotion & body feels much better etc ...Hang out with parents is one of the best i ever have because you only have one parents in your entire life ,they are the people who born you .help you and always next to you in your life from the day you grow till the day the leave you .every single moment is something money cant buy .thats why i am very apperciate with the time with them ,sometimes when i back time ,seeing my parents is one of the best reason to go home because thats my home .
Today my plan is to take good care for myself ,bring some goodies ,get a excercize because i gain weight lately and many people comment about it and get a great facial massage .
Today is a good day
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